As America begins its final countdown to the dawn of a new presidential era and the two would-be world leaders bring their door-knocking, mud slinging and policy proffering to a close the world bites its nails and nibbles its lip over who will win.
But after 21 months of fraught campaigning and an estimated £1.9 billion coughed up for the combined crusades, we’re still no nearer a dead cert. It’s a bookie’s nightmare. Oodles of vote analyses and prediction polls have got us nowhere – time to bring on the pumpkins.
That’s right, in keeping with Britain’s seasonal penchant for a carved squash 4Food is covering the most important election in recent US history as only the biggest political thinkers would: through the medium of sculpted veg.
Although (I’m ashamed to admit it) I’d never carved the features of a US presidential candidate out of a pumpkin on any previous Halloween it was surprisingly easy. Armed with a pixelated print out of the presidential wannabes and an arsenal of kitchen utensils I set to work. The future of America lies before me.
The candidates – squashed
First up, Obama, and I decide on wide open features with a welcoming grin. But, oh no, I seem to have over-scooped the eyebrows and Barack’s eyelids are looking perilously thin. Could I have damaged Democratic chances by an over jealous salad fork? The pressure is unbearable.
On to McCain and a smaller more intense arrangement with a notably larger frontal lobe – don’t blame me John, it’s what God gave you. And to be honest such a dense forehead stands the squash in good stead for survival. Is the pumpkin trying to tell me something about the importance of a solid head on presidential shoulders?
What the pumpkins predicted
Time to light the candles. McCain takes the flame first and his protruding brow serves to protect the light well but his minute features mean the flame is dulled to a weak glow. Obama on the other hand roars to light and his extensive etchings mean the room is baked in a warm inspirational glow – but how will he stand up to any sudden gusts of wind? Only time can tell.
So what can an oversized gaping vegetable head tell us about the future of America? Well to be honest, after Tuesday it’s no longer George’s problem (sorry, couldn’t resist) but the two pumpkin carvings burn on with political zeal. Which squash gets your vote?
Feed your political fervour and use up any surplus squash with this delicious pumpkin soup recipe. It’s what all the candidates crave.
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